Tuesday, November 6, 2007


So this weekend I finally got around to cleaning the office. What a freakin nightmare. I swear I love my family and friends, but there are days I want to throw them all out of here.

I have such a hard time trying to keep up with myself, picking up after myself, but throw in picking up every other person that walks through my doors is more than I can handle. People bitch my office is always messy. Well when I cleaned it up I found most of the crap that was out of place was put there by a visitor.

My brother is the worst of all. He leaves cans, wrappers, boxes, ashes everywhere. If it's in his way he moves it, doesn't make sense where he moves it, he just does it. But does he return the stuff when he's leaving? Nope, he just thinks there is a maid running around behind him. He's never lived on his own, he's never had to clean up after himself and he wonders why I get so upset sometimes. He's lost nearly all of my tools, he's trashed every room of my house all the time. He leaves my building unlocked when I'm not here, he leaves my lights on, he leaves doors open, and he wonders why I get aggrevated? I could never have a pet here because he'd let the animal out and run wild in the store, the health department would just love that.

We have no smoking laws and he wonders around this store every day with a lit ciggerette, he thinks that no one will report me. Trust me, someone will report me. After countless reminders he just keeps doing it. He's awful like that, he doesn't see anything wrong with it, so why would anyone else? He doesn't understand my life, he doesn't understand privacy. Mail comes in and he opens it, not thinking that someday he's going to open something that will very likely give him a heart attack. I have ordered things that would make him run in horror.

People just leave their shit everywhere. I spend most of my day picking up after other people, not my customers, just free loaders. I'm about to go crazy!! I love them all and they do so much for me, but they also are driving me crazy!!!!

The other thing that has been aggrevating is my lack of privacy. Having my house in my store means my family can access anything I own at any time during the day, with or without me being aware. I have no privacy. You may ask, why would you need privacy? Well trust me, I'm a single gay male in the closet, I'm thirty years old. There are things I own that people don't need to know. I shouldn't have to hide letters, purchases, etc... My brother opened his own christmas present last year when it arrived in the mail. I was livid and he just thought it was funny.

People use this as their own personal hang out. No one wonders how it much feel to hear laughter and long talks taking place when the owner of the property is serving customers. Everyone else can have a good time and just laugh at me as I get called away every two seconds. These people that have the ability to go off and do things with eachother while I'm stuck here. It makes me feel like even more of a prisoner, in my own home. It drives me crazy. These people are trying to kill me I swear.

Enough, when will they see this? People use my fax machine for long distance calls, these things add up. I have to drop what I'm doing to help these people, at times when I need help. Do you think some of these people have ever lifted a finger to help me? Nope. Some have, but many haven't. I'm tired of being the guy who does everything and gets nothing in return. I'm not looking for much, just a little consideration as well a little respect and privacy. I don't want to have to defend a dirty bedroom when no one should be in my house. I don't wand to have to search for something for three hours when it's not where I left it, because someone thought they needed it more and didn't need to tell me.

I need my own house away from here, or a big lock on my house door.
I love them, but some days I want to mame them.

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