Monday, January 26, 2009

Angery

You know, it was supposed to be a nice night out with the bowling league. Nothing fancy, just a few drinks and home by 10pm.

But yet somehow tonight I started the night respecting a good friend, and ended the night totally pissed off and lost every once of respect for a good friend. You want to cheat on your wife? Don't invite me out to watch it. You want me to meet your friends? cool, stop trying to get them to sleep with you when you have three kids at home, one of which has been out of the hospital for less than a day, and a wife of 14 years waiting for you.

I hate it. I don't care if you did not actually sleep with the woman, hanging all over her, having her in the men's room with you, and telling me you want to f### her is still cheating. I've been there, I never even met the guy but I was cheating on my girlfriend, it's plain and simple. If you're unhappy either fight for the marriage or leave, give her a little respect for the 14 years of hell you've put her through. Show her enough respect to give her a divorce before you start sleeping around.

It just goes to show you, once a cheater always a cheater. I hope this doesn't mean bad things for me. I can't stand it. I hate being invited and then told "don't say a word" Then why did you invite me????? I'll tell him like I told my old best friend.....You want to cheat on your wife, fine, I can't say anything to stop you, but stop getting me involved. Friend's don't do that to other friends. I hate this town, everyone is the same.

Why can't these people just believe in love? Why can't they respect one another enough to NOT cheat on one another, if you're unhappy just fing leave!!!!!!If your marriage or relationship is worth sticking around for then talk and get off your ass and fight for it. No wonder I have such a hard time imagining a lasting relationship, my generation doesn't seem capable of them!!

I'm so angry I can hardly stand it. Northwest Ohio is just drinking and cheating and bigotry, I'm just so sick of it. I can't just go out have a few drinks and call it a night. I'm not man enough if I don't get plowed and drive home and start over the next day. It's driving me crazy.

The other thing I hate so much right now? Pretending I'm straight in a bar with friends just because that's what makes them comfortable. I'm so sick of this.

Please God, let this place sell quickly and swiftly so I can get out of here, I'm not meant for this place, I'm not meant for this town. The town I believed in is dying with the older generation. I'm just not built for this mentality, please God, help me escape once and for all.

4 comments:

  1. I love you, too.

    You are correct on that town. No one should have to pretend to be someone they aren't just to make OTHER people happy.

    I'll make a deal with ya... you pray for me and I'll pray for you. :-)

    G

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  2. Stand up. Seriously. Next time, stand up and walk out of the bowling alley. You don't have to confront him. You don't even have to explain yourself. Just go.

    You have the right to remove yourself from an uncomfortable situation.

    You have the right to not give implied consent.


    That being said: There are adulterers around here too. There are also adulterers in Cinci.

    And homophobes.

    I'm very happy for you to be making this move, P. I really am.

    Just don't do it for the wrong reasons.

    You've been running long enough. Don't start making a laundry list of everything you want to run away from. You'll only be disappointed when you realize the only the scenery is different.

    You can only control you.

    You can make a change in location, and work on being true to yourself. You can work on your relationships.

    BUT... While you can change how you react to the negativity in the world, and how you process and deal with it all, you can not change the fact that it's out there.

    Go into this with your eyes open, and remember you're headed towards a healthier YOU. Don't run from anyone.

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  3. While I understand that there are homophobes and aldulterers everywhere ... and I don't know if you've ever been to his town, but his town is NOTHING BUT bigots and hypocrites. Okay, so maybe 85% instead of 100%, but close enough that it's horrible. Certainly Cinci isn't ALL homophobes and horrible people. :-)

    I don't know if I'm making sense tonight. I'm tired and can't quite clear my head before bed.

    -G

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