Wow, I went a whole month without an update on here? I didn't realize it had been that long, but the dates on the posts don't lie.
I have had a rough month so I didn't really feel much like talking too much about it. Things here are getting tighter than ever before, I've had to go weeks without ordering supplies, pay my bills later and later, and I'm starting to panic about when it's all going to catch up to me. What exactly can I do? It's not a rhetorical question, I'm really looking for some answers! I just wish it would sell and I could just go away and be done. My realtor is not really doing much to get the word out, half my customers don't even notice, and over half the town thinks I'm closed already. I'm not sure how to fight all this, or even if I can.
I'm on the search for a full time job, enough to cover the bills here and only have the store open part time, I don't do enough business in an 11 hour day to justify sitting here staring at the computer screen or staring at the walls. Sure there are a few things that need to be getting done, but without money they don't get done. I've considered closing the store, but the repricutions of that action are more than I can afford, so it must remain open sometime. The problem with finding a full time job around here is that they don't exist. Our unemployment rate is at 16% now and companies are still closing all around us, soon there won't be much left to look at.
So I've been dealing with those thoughts a lot this month and it's been dragging me down. The last week or so I've been trying to force myself to smile and laugh and be social and it's starting to work, but deep down inside I'm struggling, my heart is crying for relief from this and I think I'm going to end up with an ulcer. So if you know of anyone looking for an investment property please forward my information, they don't even have to run a store, they could close it for all I care and turn it into more rentals. After typing this I had a thought, if I move back home with my parents and put my stuff into storage and rent out the house, it would at least gain me another check to help defer the cost here...hmmm..... It's a thought at least.
So anyway reviewing the last entry I talked about the rat, and yes I discovered it was a rat. Living this close to the fair grounds does have some major disadvantages, but I killed it. I got some really great poison from a buddy of mine and there is poison all over the basement and crawl space and a few other places, it ate it, and died. Not before causing some major drain problems in my store though. The poison makes the rat very thirsty and he chewed his way through the only piece of plastic in my drain system to get to the water. What this did was cause all the water I used in the store kitchen, the store bath and my washer and dryer to drain all the water onto the kitchen floor and I had no idea why until I took the bathroom sink apart and found the chewed up piece of plastic. It was a quick and inexpensive fix, but aggrevating non the less.
Lets see, what else is new.... Got to see one of my god children this past weekend when they were home from Missouri, that was great. .....um.....I'm going to Cinci again in a couple of weeks for what should be a fantastic weekend!!! I'm not sure if I'll have the store open or not, probably shorten the hours while I'm gone because I find it a waste to pay someone more to watch the store than I bring in on the average day, what's the point? I'm still debating that at the current moment.
Last weekend I was also in attendance to my cousin's wedding. I realized at the reception that it is my friends that bring out my wild side, I could see myself out there dancing it up and having a great time like I usually do at my friend's weddings, but for some reason I don't do that at family weddings. It didn't help that I was cranky, hot and had unbelievable heart burn, but I know now that my family doesn't bring out the crazy side of me. Perhaps if the day had gone better, but I was up REALLY late the day before, it was 90 degrees and I was in a full suit and I was an usher. Now normally when I usher for a wedding, I usher and that's it for the night. So silly me just assumed I was done since I wasn't told any different. So after the wedding I'm at the reception with my family, I had just took a drink of my beer and was getting some finger foods when my parents start yelling at me, turns out I was supposed to stay for pictures and they were waiting on me. My exhaustion was the helping factor in me being so upset about it. I was at the church 2 hours before the wedding and talked to everyone involved, I seated everyone there, and talked to everyone again in the recieving line and not once did anyone mention pictures to me.
But I went back to the church and joined the rest of the pictures, where I'm not even sure I can be seen. I wasn't really into it and the 3 pictures they wanted me in were random group shots. I know I should feel good about being included in these shots, but really? You were waiting on me to do that? So they thanked me for coming back (mentally calming me down) and told me I was free to go. So I head back to the reception where I couldn't find parking, hiked about a mile in my suit to go back to the party where I was sitting and chatting when the bridal party showed up. I'm sitting there watching as they start the entrance music and then I hear my name announced with the other usher. Um, really? No one could have told me I was expected to walk in with the bridal party? So everyone at the table turns to me and is giving me an expression I took as "WTF?" I was upset again. At that point I wanted to just forget about the reception and just go home and go to bed, I was tired and irritable and nothing that night was helping me.
But it wasn't that big of a deal, I brought it on myself because when I'm that tired I get irrational about normal social settings. I drank beer that only provoked my heart burn to get worse and by the time the reception ended I was already headed towards the door on my way home. I waited for the family to drop off their food to be stored in my cooler and fell fast asleep on my couch watching t.v. It was a good party, everyone had a good time, no drama (except that drama in my head), but I just couldn't get into it. I felt as if my social skills were out the window because I had a hard time just having conversations with my family that was in town, the whole financial situation of the store didn't help either because that's all anyone every asks me about.
But anyway I'm glad I was there, I'm glad I was included, but next time I'm going to get sleep the night before, for the sake of everyone around me. lol.
What else has there been........um.....not much really. June went by so fast, I'm trying to stay motivated to keep updating, but not much happens around here. I wonder what would happen if I blogged everyday, what would they look like?
I worked today, I wanted to punch most of my customers in the head for being stupid. Then I worked at Wendy's and felt the same way.
I worked today and came close to throwing that punk out the window because he's mouthy, I should find his parents and punch them in the head. Then I worked at Wendy's and discovered based on the next generation of decision makers that our future is doomed.
I worked today and was harrased by little old ladies because the price of chocolate went up by 5 cents a pound and then harrased again because I didn't have change for their hundred dollar bill, I should have punched them in the head. Had the night off of Wendy's and fell asleep on my couch.
I worked today and the central air broke, for good. It's now 100 degrees in here and I had a customer wonder why her candy bar was soft and melted. I should have punched her in her head. I worked at Wendy's tonight and had someone call me a fat ass in the drive thru.
I worked today and had someone come in and asked if I was still open and where the old owner was...um he died 5 years ago, and then have her argue with me and tell me he couldn't be dead because she was just in last week and talked to him. I should have just punched her in the head. I had the night off of Wendy's tonight and fell asleep on my couch.
I worked today and spent most of my day on the internet because I only had about 5 people come in and it was to ask if I had live bait. I wanted to punch myself in the head. Worked at Wendy's tonight and had food thrown at me from some bit$$ in the drive-thru.
I slept in today. Cleaned the house, avoided phone calls, didn't answer the door, just holed myself up like a hermit and watched horrible movies on t.v. all day, and didn't get the urge to hit anyone in the head. It's a good day.
There, there is 7 days of my life, if I go another month without blogging please refer to this post and read those 7 days to catch up to my normal every day life. ;) Or I'll punch you in the head.
I think I might....MIGHT have an obsession with punching people in the head, I'm not sure, it's just a theory.
I'm not meant to be self employeed, what can I say?