Friday, March 11, 2011

Sorry folks, mental block

I have fallen behind on writing I know, but I have about 6 posts in the draft stage waiting to be finished, hopefully in a better frame of mind.

The crazy has come so close to the surface lately I was afraid of it pouring out too much onto here and end up scaring everyone so I had to reel it in a bit to keep myself in check.

There has been much good happening but something in my head that has been stopping me from enjoying it the way I should be, it's that dang self doubt again. Lately it has me feeling like I'm barely holding it together. Once I get a handle on it I can finish these posts.

All is good, I promise, it's just all in my head, once I figure out how to get out of my head a bit I'll make some room for all of you to take a peek in, but I must have the liability waivers prepared first.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

February Good Things

Feb. 1: Did not get much done and for once, didn't give myself a hard time about it.

Feb. 2: Had some hilarious conversations with some fun people at work. Laughter certainly breaks up the day.

Feb. 3: to be honest, nothing memorable about today.

Feb. 4: Pizza and a movie. What a great ending to an interesting day.

Feb. 5: Spent the evening getting two teenage girls in trouble with their mother while we were all at a jewelry party. I should have stopped one margarita before.

Feb. 6: Caught up on some me time.

Feb. 7:received several emails today congratulating me on my rank standings so far this month. #1 agent in both locations.

Feb. 8: Had dinner with the roommate at her other job and somehow life was good again. lol.

Feb. 9: Had a great day at work, (I know, a WHAT?) found out I'm getting a bonus for last month and was in the top 25% of the agents between both call centers in the company!

Feb. 10: realized how good the gym makes me feel when we go, I only realized this after a week of not going. Next week is a new week though.

Feb. 11: Had a good review at work, not sure how, but I seem to be doing o.k. at this job.

Feb. 12: Caught up with a good friend tonight, had a good time.

Feb. 13: Took a great walk and enjoyed this unusually warm weather today.

Feb. 14: Took myself out for Vday dinner, got fresh with myself and threw myself out. I can't believe I think I'm that cheap. ;)

Feb. 15: I made it through today and even mingled amongst the normals. It was a very odd day with lack of focus but I made it to the other side.

Feb. 16: it was a rough day but Penn Station with the roommate made it all better.

Feb. 17: Some days the good thing I can hold on to is that all the brokeness happening around me is not mine and I can be around to help people.......at a distance.

Feb. 18: Cousins came in to town today and much merriment was had by all. I sleep so well with family in the house.

Feb. 19: Breakfast and dinner with two of my favorite cousins! Plus the potential of them moving to the area makes for a good day!

Feb. 20: I slept so late and I felt so good, plus the roommate came home!

Feb. 21: Everything seemed to sync up today at work. No crazy beating my head on a table kind of day, just a day that made me feel like I can survive the crazies that call.

Feb. 22: Still got a project off of my list today even with my sinuses attempting to kill me.

Feb. 23: Glad the sinus medication kicked in and I was able to be fully functional today!

Feb. 24: I just got an interview scheduled! Excited to see where this goes.

Feb. 25: Attended a service at church and revelled in their excitement for the future.

Feb. 26: Had a great dinner with my family, it was good times.

Feb. 27: Got to see some old friends and spend time with my family.

Feb. 28: Had what I think was a good interview and dinner and drinks with the boys afterwards.