Freedom comes from Confinement

I think I've used this title before. I've been withdrawing from my online community lately. I've tried to withdraw from every day society as well, but it seems like there is something happening every minute of every day that someone feels I need to be a part of. I withdraw at times of depression, I didn't even want to write this blog because I'm not sure what anyone can say to bring me out of it. I know it's myself keeping me in it, but I can't see the forest through these damn trees these days. I don't know if I'll be able to keep my doors open much longer, things have hit some really bad spots and I'm not bringing in even 1/2 of what I need to bring in everyday to pay the bills. I can't just close up shop because the bank will take the store and I won't be able to pay back any of they money I owe to people. I've been looking for full time third shift work so I could do the store part time and work full time third shift to cover t...

So I've been feeling extra "single" lately. The funny part is it isn't because of weddings or gatherings that usually bring it on, it's the amount of information about single people I've been coming across. B sent me a blog today from SCL about singles in church and has had a matchmaking email sent to her. I find it all so funny how everyone thinks everyone in life needs to be married. I'm watching my brother going through his second divorce, my cousin in Jersey going through her first, I see these things every day and wonder, what's all the fuss about? I think it's highly over rated and I really don't see a marriage being the thing that is keeping me from being truely happy. If I can't be happy on my own, why would I give that responsibility to someone else? I think it's just crazy. Am I lonely? yes, but I was just as lonely when I was dating. Do I feel like 1/2 a person, no I have plenty of me to complete myself, I actually have...